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Wednesday, September 9, 2009, ( 21 views ) - Diagnosis - Posted by Emily

Rarely do I find myself at a loss for words...here I sit...staring at a blinking cursor wondering where to begin. What can one say about somebody who has taught me unconditional love, how to stay strong when the chips are down, to embrace each day, and to live life to the fullest. While Newton's registered name is Divine RR Lucky Lounge Lizard, I am the lucky one. I got to share my life with such an incredible boy.

Yesterday, Newton got his angel wings. It wasn't something that I was expecting to have to do, but it was his time. Over the past week, Newton just wasn't quite himself. His energy level was down and he wasn't eating much. Anybody that knows Newton, knows that he is a very picky eater. Unless there were some tasty mix-ins in his kibble, he just wouldn't eat. I think his record was 3 days before I broke down and added some mix-ins. So while his lack of interest in food caught my attention, it was his lack of motivation to acknowledge those around him that gave me cause for concern. Rarely does Newton allow somebody in his house without barking at them. On Monday, he just let people in without even lifting his head. I knew something was up.

While Newton was getting his chest x-rays done, Dr. Perry came out and told me that Newton's belly felt enlarged and recommended that we do an ultrasound. Newton's blood work, x-rays, and ultrasound reported findings that I wasn't quite ready to hear. His red blood cell count had dropped 10% since his visit July 23rd, there were a couple of tumors visible in his lungs, several large tumors in his spleen, and his belly was full of blood. While Dr. Perry indicated that his condition wasn't critical, he did say that Newton did not have much time. Since I knew there were a ton of people who would want to say their good-byes, I asked Dr. Perry if I could help Newton cross the bridge on Friday, September 11th. September 11th marked the 1 year anniversary of Newton's first Oncology visit at CSU where his Osteosarcoma was pretty much confirmed. Just as Dr. Perry and I finished discussing this (he didn't think that there would be a problem with Friday), he got a page and left me in the room looking at Newton's x-rays and ultrasound and feeling quite overwhelmed. When Dr. Perry returned, he indicated that the page was regarding Newton and that he was having a hard time getting up after the ultrasound. At that point, I realized that I may have to let my baby go sooner rather than later.

When they brought Newton into the room with me, I knew that it was time. He no longer had the spring his step that I saw just a few hours earlier and the look in his eyes...he was telling me that he was ready. During our last few moments, Newton and I took a walk down memory lane...talking about how he:
  • Was my favorite the first time I laid eyes on him when he was 3 days old.
  • Picked me. I thought it was so cute when he would protect me from the puppy acupuncture by barking at his siblings. Little did I know that his bark would pretty much scare the crap out of everybody for the rest of his life.
  • Taught Chloe, a 4 year old rescue, how to play. It took him almost 6 months (going to the dog park every weekend), but he finally wore her down. I'm glad that they got to play with each other over the holiday weekend.
  • Inspired others with his story as a 3-legged "big dog" and contributed to understanding more about this disease.
  • Made me feel so very special. I could be gone for 15 minutes and he would come running up like I had been gone for a week.
  • Was going to have so much fun being pain free and getting to romp around with all of his friends that passed before him.

While he may not be here in body, I know that he is here in spirit. And I have to chuckle when I think about the day he picked to cross the bridge...9-9-09. Not many people know the story behind how he got his registered name. I had chosen the name Newton because that is my favorite scientist. My breeder wanted a Vegas theme for the AKC registration of Newton's litter. While the Lounge Lizard refers to Wayne Newton . I picked Lucky Lounge Lizard because when you turn the first letters over, you get 7-7-7...my winner! He is my lucky boy and he will forever have a very special place in my heart.




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